DAVID CAMERON'S LAST PMQS: HALF AN HOUR OF JOKES AND JIBES
David
Cameron didn't waste his Prime Minister's Questions - he packed it full
of jokes for his MPs to cheer and laugh - and targeted the Labour
leader Jeremy Corbyn with his usual barbs.
Looking
forward to the weeks of free time ahead of him, Mr Cameron began the
half an hour of jokes by telling MPs: ‘Other than one meeting this
afternoon with Her Majesty the Queen, the diary for the rest of my day
is remarkably light,’ Mr Cameron said to widespread laughter.
Mr Cameron mocked the Labour party’s current chaos in response to Mr Corbyn accusing him of failing to eradicate poverty.
The
outgoing PM said: ‘To be accused of slow-thin delivery by the right
honourable gentleman, let’s just take the last week – we’ve both been
having these leadership elections.
‘We
got on with it, we’ve had resignation, nomination, competition and
coronation; they haven’t even decided what the rules are yet.
‘If they ever got in to power it would take them about a year to work out who sits where.’
Mr
Corbyn, fresh from his party’s decision to allow him to automatically
get on the ballot paper for its leadership election, replied: ‘Democracy
is an exciting and splendid thing and I’m enjoying every moment of it.’
Mr Cameron praised Mr Corbyn for his defiant refusal to stand down despite losing the confidence of all but 40 of his MPs.
Mocking
the Labour leader, Mr Cameron said: ‘Let me say something to him about
the democratic process about leadership elections… I am beginning to
enjoy his tenacity.
‘He
is reminding me of the Black Knight in the Holy Grail, he’s been kicked
so many times but he says “keep going, it’s only a flesh wound”. I
admire that,’ Mr Cameron said, drawing loud laughter from his own
benches.
Mr
Cameron also took the opportunity to mock Mr Corbyn’s style of asking
questions from emails he receives from the general public.
Mr Cameron said: ‘I’m glad he mentions emails because actually I’ve got an email as well.
‘Now,
I got this on the 16 September 2015 from someone called Judith and she
said this: “Please, please keep dignity and not triumphalism in the
first PMQs today with Jeremy Corbyn." And she gave this reason.
'She
said because Tom Watson who may oust Jeremy Corbyn is a very different
kettle of fish, he's experienced, organised and far more dangerous in
the long term.
She
goes: "So sensible, sober, polite answers to Mr Corbyn - let him create
his own party disunity."
'After this is over, I've got to find Judith
and find out what on earth happens next,’ Mr Cameron joked.
Mr
Corbyn used his last question to joke about Mr Cameron’s jibe at his
scruffy dress sense in an exchange earlier this year – when the PM said
his mother would tell the Labour leader to ‘put on a proper suit, do up
your tie and sing the national anthem’.
Mr Corbyn joked: 'I’d also like him to pass on my thanks to his mum for her advice about ties and suits and songs.
'It’s
extremely kind of her and I’d be grateful if he could pass that on to
her personally and I’m reflecting on the lesson she offered.'
He
then asked: 'But I’ve got one rumour that I’d like him to deal with.
There’s a rumour going round that his departure has been carefully
choreographed so he can slip seamlessly into the vacancy created this
morning on Strictly by Len Goodman’s departure. Is that his next
career?'
Sadly
Mr Cameron immediately ruled out taking the job, saying: ‘I don’t
really have a paso doble so I can promise that’s not the case.’
He
promised to pass his thanks onto his mother and praises Mr Corbyn for
‘taking her advice and looking absolutely splendid today’.
And
expressing sorrow for leaving Larry the cat behind, Mr Cameron
said: ‘The rumour that somehow I don't love Larry, I do...I can't take
Larry with me, he belongs to the house and the staff love him very much,
as do I, Mr Cameron said
No comments:
Post a Comment